NJSBA Family Law Section

Friends and Colleagues --

Please see below for an email I received from a colleague of ours about recent postings on our list serve. Our Section is very diverse. This is what makes us one of the best Sections of the Bar. Before you post, please think about what you are posting, who you could be offending and the audience reading your post. Not only is it the right thing to do, it is also in accordance with the rules governing list serve.

PLEASE DO NOT REPLY TO MY POST. I AM ASKING ONLY THAT YOU THINK ABOUT THIS POST AND ACT ACCORDINGLY. Thank you.



Dear Jeralyn

I am the Chair of the LGBT Rights Section of the NJSBA. I am writing to you in your capacity as Chair of the Family Law Section ("FLS"). On Wednesday, October 8, 2014 a member of the LGBT Rights Section, who also happens to be a member of the FLS, posted the following on our listserv:

Those of you that also subscribe to the Family Law Section listserv may have seen the thread yesterday about the annulment. An attorney was asking if her client would have to be responsible for medical procedures her husband had done during the marriage if an annulment was granted. One attorney responded publicly with the following:

"In other words, did she know he was going to have sexual reassignment surgery before she married him."

Thinking that perhaps I had missed a key portion of the thread, I emailed that attorney privately and questioned why he made the comment. He emailed me back and said, "It was a joke!"

The section member who posted on the LGBT Rights Section's listserv was upset, finding the post and the private response, to be insensitive and transphobic. That post led to a discussion on our Section's listserv as to whether the comment was simply ignorant, or truly transphobic and what transphobia means.

So it is clear, my purpose in bringing this to your attention is not to attack or condemn anyone. My hope is that we can use this event to educate all of our members to be sensitive to the diversity of not only other NJSBA members, but the citizens of New Jersey, our clients and our adversaries' clients.

The reason members of the LGBT Rights Section found the post offense was because it took a benign question - if there was an annulment would the client be responsible for the medical procedures performed during the marriage - and attempted to make a joke at the expense of the transgender community. In the original question there is not a hint that the medical procedures in question involved a transgender individual. It could have been for experimental life saving surgery not covered by insurance; or perhaps the couple didn't have insurance at all. The responder to the post thought it "was a joke" to respond that the husband in question "was going to have sexual reassignment surgery." Why is that a joke? Why would making light of such a situation be amusing? And, most importantly, why would you even think of that scenario when it was not hinted at in the original post.

I should note that I am one of the few out and open transgender attorneys in the state. I have firsthand experience with transphobia. However, I want make it clear that it was not just my sensibility that was offended; many other members of the LGBT Rights Section found the post to be offense and transphobic. Why -because the post makes fun of and trivializes a minority population. Gender Confirming Surgery (to use the correct terminology) is a very real experience for some transgender individuals. It can be a key component in a treatment protocol to help an individual live their best life possible. Gender Confirming Surgery is not a punch line to a joke for any transgender individual; it is real, and it is literally transformative. I doubt that anyone would have found it acceptable if the reference had implicated ethnic, racial or religious identities. So it is equally unacceptable to reference a transgender identity.

As I said at the outset, my purpose in writing is not to criticize, but to make this a teaching moment. Transgender individuals remain largely misunderstood and marginalized in mainstream society, of which the Bar Association is but a microcosm. I would like to propose that our Sections work together to help educate all of our members, and the Bar Association in general, to the issues transgender individuals, as well as the wider LGBT community, deal with on a daily basis. I, and other members of the LGBT Rights Section, are more than willing to appear at a FLS meeting, or a FLEC meeting, to present on these cultural competency issues. We are also willing to co-sponsor a panel at the Annual Meeting in Atlantic City on this and other LGBT issues. From my perspective, I believe it is critically important for FLS members to have an understanding of these issues because when they do come up in the already emotionally charged environment of family disputes, how an attorney reacts, may be critical in educating his or her client on how to properly understand the issue.

Thank you for taking the time to discuss this with me and I look forward to working with you moving forward.

Sincerely,

Robyn

Robyn B. Gigl

Stein, McGuire, Pantages & Gigl, LLP

354 Eisenhower Parkway, P.O. Box 460

Livingston, NJ  07039-0460

973-992-1100  -- FAX 973-535-3990

Friends and Colleagues --

Please see below for an email I received from a colleague of ours about recent postings on our list serve. Our Section is very diverse. This is what makes us one of the best Sections of the Bar. Before you post, please think about what you are posting, who you could be offending and the audience reading your post. Not only is it the right thing to do, it is also in accordance with the rules governing list serve.

PLEASE DO NOT REPLY TO MY POST. I AM ASKING ONLY THAT YOU THINK ABOUT THIS POST AND ACT ACCORDINGLY. Thank you.



Dear Jeralyn

I am the Chair of the LGBT Rights Section of the NJSBA. I am writing to you in your capacity as Chair of the Family Law Section ("FLS"). On Wednesday, October 8, 2014 a member of the LGBT Rights Section, who also happens to be a member of the FLS, posted the following on our listserv:

Those of you that also subscribe to the Family Law Section listserv may have seen the thread yesterday about the annulment. An attorney was asking if her client would have to be responsible for medical procedures her husband had done during the marriage if an annulment was granted. One attorney responded publicly with the following:

"In other words, did she know he was going to have sexual reassignment surgery before she married him."

Thinking that perhaps I had missed a key portion of the thread, I emailed that attorney privately and questioned why he made the comment. He emailed me back and said, "It was a joke!"

The section member who posted on the LGBT Rights Section's listserv was upset, finding the post and the private response, to be insensitive and transphobic. That post led to a discussion on our Section's listserv as to whether the comment was simply ignorant, or truly transphobic and what transphobia means.

So it is clear, my purpose in bringing this to your attention is not to attack or condemn anyone. My hope is that we can use this event to educate all of our members to be sensitive to the diversity of not only other NJSBA members, but the citizens of New Jersey, our clients and our adversaries' clients.

The reason members of the LGBT Rights Section found the post offense was because it took a benign question - if there was an annulment would the client be responsible for the medical procedures performed during the marriage - and attempted to make a joke at the expense of the transgender community. In the original question there is not a hint that the medical procedures in question involved a transgender individual. It could have been for experimental life saving surgery not covered by insurance; or perhaps the couple didn't have insurance at all. The responder to the post thought it "was a joke" to respond that the husband in question "was going to have sexual reassignment surgery." Why is that a joke? Why would making light of such a situation be amusing? And, most importantly, why would you even think of that scenario when it was not hinted at in the original post.

I should note that I am one of the few out and open transgender attorneys in the state. I have firsthand experience with transphobia. However, I want make it clear that it was not just my sensibility that was offended; many other members of the LGBT Rights Section found the post to be offense and transphobic. Why -because the post makes fun of and trivializes a minority population. Gender Confirming Surgery (to use the correct terminology) is a very real experience for some transgender individuals. It can be a key component in a treatment protocol to help an individual live their best life possible. Gender Confirming Surgery is not a punch line to a joke for any transgender individual; it is real, and it is literally transformative. I doubt that anyone would have found it acceptable if the reference had implicated ethnic, racial or religious identities. So it is equally unacceptable to reference a transgender identity.

As I said at the outset, my purpose in writing is not to criticize, but to make this a teaching moment. Transgender individuals remain largely misunderstood and marginalized in mainstream society, of which the Bar Association is but a microcosm. I would like to propose that our Sections work together to help educate all of our members, and the Bar Association in general, to the issues transgender individuals, as well as the wider LGBT community, deal with on a daily basis. I, and other members of the LGBT Rights Section, are more than willing to appear at a FLS meeting, or a FLEC meeting, to present on these cultural competency issues. We are also willing to co-sponsor a panel at the Annual Meeting in Atlantic City on this and other LGBT issues. From my perspective, I believe it is critically important for FLS members to have an understanding of these issues because when they do come up in the already emotionally charged environment of family disputes, how an attorney reacts, may be critical in educating his or her client on how to properly understand the issue.

Thank you for taking the time to discuss this with me and I look forward to working with you moving forward.

Sincerely,

Robyn

Robyn B. Gigl

Stein, McGuire, Pantages & Gigl, LLP

354 Eisenhower Parkway, P.O. Box 460

Livingston, NJ  07039-0460

973-992-1100  -- FAX 973-535-3990