This may sound harsh but it sounds as though there are mixed messages being sent to bio-mom.
The school should have the adoption judgment and not permit bio-mom at the school.
Aunt-mom should not be allowing the child to be with bio-mom alone during which programs are being joined and outings enjoyed.
It seems from the facts provided that the family has not been firm enough with bio-mom, and may have even contributed to a mistaken belief that her role in the child's life would grow over time.
Imagine if anyone other than bio-mom was acting in this fashion.
Now that there is a flight concern, anything other than permitting contact at family gatherings when other relations are enjoying contact with aunt-mom's adoptive child seems reckless.
Carol Goloff
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The Law & Mediation Office of Carol N. Goloff
2216 Shore Road
Northfield, NJ 08225
Telephone (609) 646-1333
Facsimile (609) 641-6373
Attorney ID #028211987
Original Message------
Greetings,
Interesting situation:
Bio-mom and dad are heroin addicts who lose custody of their daughter to her sister. Sister is able to obtain an adoption of the daughter cutting off both parent's rights. Bio-mom leaves for CA for 6 years. The child undergoes a lot of therapy to get over this. Now the child is 9 years old. Bio-mom spontaneously comes back from CA. Daughter is overjoyed to be reunited, but there are problems.
Bio-mom still thinks she has rights to the child even though everyone, including a judge, has told her she doesn't. Still, She goest to the school, she enrolls the daughter in programs, she calls friends and arranges parties at the sister's house, she takes the daughter places without warning, she is around all the time... There are concerns that she is a bad influence, (she has only been clean for a couple of years), that she is just using the child for attention, that she could kidnap the child....
The family doesn't really know what to do. They don't want to get the police involved to keep the bio-mom away, but I think that is an option or some sort of restraining order.
I kindly ask for your feedback.
Best,
Cara
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Cara Parmigiani Esq.
Mountain Lakes NJ
(973)722-7655
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