NJSBA Family Law Section

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  • 1.  Girlfriend moving in with Dad - Mom does not believe it to be appropriate

    Posted 07-24-2015 10:13 AM

    Hello listmates:

    Client and dad divorced two years ago.  Dad has been dating girlfriend since the time of the divorce and the children have met and have spent time with her.  Now dad has informed mom/client that girlfriend is moving in September 1 and mom does not believe that it is appropriate since they are not married or even engaged to be married.  Mom's position is not based in any animosity since she has been dating someone for the past year so this is in no way a jealousy issue.  Children are 11 (son) and 13 (daughter).  Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. 

    Best,

    Eric

     

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    Eric Hannum Esq.
    Jackson NJ
    (732)370-9596
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  • 2.  RE: Girlfriend moving in with Dad - Mom does not believe it to be appropriate

    Posted 07-24-2015 12:14 PM

    Eric,

    A number of years ago, Judge Dilts wrote an unreported opinion where he set forth the factors that should to be examined when determining the appropriateness of a significant other staying overnight while the children are present (I apologize for not having the name).  Off the top of my head, they included the age of the children and the length of the relationship between the parent and the s.o.  Ultimately, this is a "best interest" analysis and hinges on the facts.  Based on the facts that you set forth below, Mom's protests regarding the appropriateness may not be well-received.  Dad is in a 2-year relationship, s.o. has met and spent time with the children.  Has he s.o. slept over before while the kids had parenting time with Dad, accompanied them on vacation with Dad and s.o. sharing a room?  Has Mom had her s.o. sleep over while kids were with her?  Only factor that may work in your favor in terms of a "best interest" analysis is the age of the kids.  While I understand Mom's position, it may be seen as being "antiquated".  As a reminder, Mom cannot dicate Dad's "morals"; same goes vice versa. 


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    Nancy Marchioni Esq.
    Middlesex NJ
    (732)667-3668
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  • 3.  RE: Girlfriend moving in with Dad - Mom does not believe it to be appropriate

    Posted 07-24-2015 12:23 PM
    The case nancy references is gargiulo but it dealt with the pendente lite period, not post judgment.

    Amy Zylman Shimalla, Esq.
    Collaborative Practitioner, Mediator & Certified Matrimonial Attorney
    908-753-3833 (p)
    908-753-4189 (f)




  • 4.  RE: Girlfriend moving in with Dad - Mom does not believe it to be appropriate

    Posted 07-24-2015 12:33 PM
    Try Kelly v. Kelly, 217 N.J. Super. 147 (Ch. Div. 1986)

    The case is a Chancery Division opinion, I believe by Judge Clyne. It
    specifically dealt with the issue in a post-judgment matter and confirms
    some of the comments made by Ms. Marchioni.




    Armando R. Horta, Esq.

    The Horta Law Group, LLC
    The Renaissance Center
    15 Engle Street, Suite 102
    Englewood, New Jersey 07631
    Office: 201-375-3975
    Fax: 201-371-5510
    www.HortaLawGroup.com

    Email: [email protected]



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    On Fri, Jul 24, 2015 at 12:23 PM, Amy Shimalla via New Jersey State Bar




  • 5.  RE: Girlfriend moving in with Dad - Mom does not believe it to be appropriate

    Posted 07-24-2015 01:55 PM
    You may also want to check out Giangeruso v. Giangeruso, 310 N.J. Super. 476 (Ch. Div. 1997), in which the Court invalidated a PSA that read: "The parties agree that the children shall not have any contact with any girlfriend/boyfriend or love interest of the other if the children express reluctance to do so."

    The rationale is likely distinguishable though. The Court focused on the effect of the PSA putting the decision in the hands of children through "express[ed] reluctant" and stated, "By shifting the decision making burden to the children, paragraph F of the Agreement places the children in the midst of ongoing post-judgment visitation disputes."

    Kelly v. Kelly seems more on point given the apparent moral objection.

    ---
    Andrew M. Shaw
    Associate Attorney

    DeTommaso Law Group, LLC
    73 Grove Street
    Somerville, NJ 08876

    Phone: (908) 595-0340
    Fax: (908) 595-0343

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  • 6.  RE: Girlfriend moving in with Dad - Mom does not believe it to be appropriate

    Posted 07-24-2015 01:53 PM
    Send them to mediation!

    --
    Adam J. Berner, Esq., M.A.
    Mediator, Collaborative Lawyer & Trainer


    *New York City Office*260 Madison Avenue, 22nd Floor, New York, NY 10016
    212-721-7555


    *New Jersey, Bergen County Office*1 University Plaza, Suite 214,
    Hackensack, NJ 07601
    201-836-0777

    Fax Number: 201-336-9130
    E-mail: [email protected]
    Web Address: www.MediationOffices.com




  • 7.  RE: Girlfriend moving in with Dad - Mom does not believe it to be appropriate

    Posted 07-25-2015 11:48 AM

    Carol,

    There is a grace period upon return to work. I haven't checked in a few years, but it had been 9 months - which seems to match the period for your client's payments.  During the grace period SS is still paid. I believe it can extend beyond that time at a reduced rate if the person meets the SS income calculation.  Medicare also continues, for a significant number of years (7?) upon reemployment.  

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    Shelley J. Pedersen Esq.

    Pedersen Law Firm, LLC
    Jamesburg, NJ
    (732) 641-2069

    [email protected]
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