Communication is at the heart of legal practice. Whether addressing a jury, questioning a witness or negotiating a contract, attorneys rely on their ability to articulate ideas with precision and purpose. Yet true communication goes beyond persuasive speaking. It requires thoughtful listening. Applying that balance outside the courtroom is just as important to maintaining strong, positive personal relationships.
The NJSBA provided guidance on cultivating mindful communication through a free online webinar aimed at helping lawyers build and maintain positive professional relationships. The program was provided through the NJSBA Member Assistance Program, a free member benefit that connects members – and anyone else in their households – to trained, experienced mental health professionals and resources. Check out the NJSBA calendar for another free wellness event in April.
What is Mindful Communication?
Mindful communication means applying mindfulness principles – presence, attention and non‑judgment – to everyday interactions. It emphasizes being aware of your own thoughts, emotions and intentions while remaining conscious of the other person’s perspective.
Types of Communication Styles
The program outlines four primary communication styles and how they influence interactions:
-Passive: Not speaking up for one’s needs – often leads to feelings that go unexpressed.
-Aggressive: Communicating in a forceful or disrespectful manner that disregards others’ feelings.
-Passive-Aggressive: Indirectly expressing anger or frustration through behaviors rather than honest dialogue.
-Assertive: The ideal style – expressing needs clearly and respectfully while honoring the needs of others.
Why Assertive Communication is Preferred
Assertive communication is highlighted as a key component of mindful speaking. It doesn’t mean being combative or forceful in your conversations. It involves expressing needs, concern and boundaries clearly while respecting the other person. This approach supports healthy, balanced relationships and reduces misunderstandings.
The Two Pillars of Mindful Communication:
Mindful Listening
Mindful listening is listening with the intent to understand, not to reply. It involves full presence and conscious effort to hear both verbal and non-verbal messages.
Key listening skills include:
-Focusing on the content and body language.
-Organizing what you hear through reflection and observation.
-Giving your full attention or acknowledging if you cannot.
-Avoiding distractions and interruptions.
-Listening with both your mind and your emotions.
Mindful Speaking
Mindful speaking focuses on clarity, intention and authenticity. It encourages slowing down to express yourself purposefully and compassionately.
Core practices include:
-Pausing to gather your thoughts before speaking.
-Monitoring your own tone, clarity and volume.
-Ensuring your message is appropriate and meaningful.
-Being concise and specific.
-Using examples when helpful.
-Being aware of your audience’s reactions and body language.
-Speaking truthfully and authentically.