In a nation where one in five households care for a person with disabilities, it’s important that parents struggling with work and family life remember they aren’t alone.
Ask Angela C. Scheck, the New Jersey State Bar Association executive director, who has a son on the autism spectrum. Her years in the profession have taught her that many lawyers have children in similar circumstances, but few bond over the unique experience of juggling childcare while practicing law.
A new NJSBA committee, proposed by Scheck, hopes to change that. At the Board of Trustees meeting in June, the trustees will consider formalizing the committee as a support community for attorneys to share advice on where to seek medical care, parenting tips and how to cope with work and family life stressors. Any Association member caring for a child with disabilities or a child struggling with their mental health is invited to join.
Scheck spoke recently about her experience and her vision for the new committee.
What are some of the greatest challenges attorneys face in balancing work while raising a child with disabilities?Generally speaking, I think the biggest challenge is balancing the needs that your child has, which can be educational, therapeutic or medical, with trying to also be present and engaged in your profession. Parents need to be present and active caretakers, at times quasi therapists, in order for their children to reach their true potential. .
Sometimes you can feel isolated because it’s a complicated world to navigate. There are resources to help, but that assistance can be hard to find. For instance, some insurers don’t provide coverage for your child’s disability, and those who don’t know how to find specialists and experts end up paying out of pocket or waiting six months for an appointment.
It has struck me over and over again how many people don’t really have a resource of other people readily available, whether for advice on schools or therapists or simply just to understand what your life is like because theirs is similar.
At what point did you decide to propose a committee to address this issue and why?When my son was really young, nobody could explain what was wrong with him. His first symptom was that he didn’t speak. I just went on a mission to find as much information as a could, but there was almost no information to be found.
What proved most helpful for me was to talk to other parents—about school, other diagnoses and things like that. Since that time, I’ve tried to help parents and kids with disabilities by sharing the information that I’ve learned on my journey.
I’ve talked to a lot of Association members, and I’ve learned that there are many people in the legal profession who have kids with disabilities or who are caring for a sibling with a disability. I just thought it would be a good idea to form a group of people who have this connection, who can come together and share the information and experiences that they have. I’m hoping they feel less isolated knowing that there are people who do the same work that they do and are on the same journey.
Describe your vision for the committee. What ideas will it discuss? What are its goals? How will it be beneficial to members? The specific goals of the committee will be decided by the people who join. For starters, I want it to be a space where legal professionals can come together and feel part of a community. I was meeting more and more lawyers who would disclose that they had a child with a disability, and we would talk about it. And as I realized how many people were out there, I thought it made sense to connect people with one another as a resource and just as a place to talk about the unique stressors we face.
One of the greatest benefits that I’ve gotten from a network like that is through my son playing sports. We’ve met a group of people who are involved with the Special Olympics, and we’ve become a second family. I want the committee to function like that – a resource for information exchange and to develop professional relationships and even friendships.
So far, what has the reaction been to the committee? I’ve talked to a number of lawyers who I personally know have children with disabilities, and universally they are very excited about the prospect of having this committee and having the opportunity to meet with other parents who are in the same place and be a resource for each other.
The committee has no limit. It’s open to as many people who need it. It could break into regional groups if it grows large enough.
If this can help relieve a little bit of stress in someone’s life, then I think it will serve an important and noble purpose.
NJSBA members who are interested in joining the committee can contact [email protected].